A piece from Charly Boy. Please read...
Does
anyone know how I really feel right now? So alone and empty, God! how I
feel the pain. If you're in the wilderness like me, then you know it
can be insane. Here my eyes are bleeding tears and my smiles are
protecting my fears. I can't even go around and fake happy, because I’m
in stagnation and it is hitting me from all direction. There is this
disturbing feeling that time is passing me by, yet I’m paralyzed, I
can't move and I can't think too far. At nights I can't sleep too easy,
my heart is sore and my mind perpetually clustered with things that
leave me shaking. Oh God! Why? I have prayed, I have fasted but nothing
has changed, and it's almost a year now. My dreams are nothing but
nightmares of all the negatives in this wilderness. What's happening to
me? Look at me, I have always enjoyed comforting and giving directions
to people in pain, right now I can't even save myself and I have refused
to take my own pills.
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